Category: English

  • Mental aur Physical Health: Dono Ke Liye Emotional Awareness Zaroori Hai”

    हमें अपनी मुश्किल फीलिंग्स के बारे में बात करने की ज़रूरत है, जैसे कि हमें  kis baat ka डर लगता है, kis baat ki chinta hai। Anxiety बहुत ज़्यादा crippling हो सकती है, लेकिन इसे दबाने के बजाय बात करना ज़रूरी है ताकि इसे system से बाहर निकाला जा सके। अगर हम अपनी negative emotions जैसे गुस्सा, stress और डर को बहुत लंबे समय तक छुपाकर रखें, तो हमारा nervous system auto-pilot पर चलने लगता है। Body defence mode में चली जाती है और हम खुद से दूर होने लगते हैं। सबसे stressful situations में हम एक घूमती हुई लट्टू की तरह हो जाते हैं, jo apne behavior ko control nahi kar sakta aur apne se pareshan ticking bomb ban jata hai।

    चाहे हम anxiety feel कर रहे हों, डर या गुस्सा, इन emotions को label करना ज़रूरी है। इन्हें acknowledge करना ज़रूरी है। इन्हें दबाना नहीं चाहिए, क्योंकि अगर हम इन्हें बहुत गहरा दबा दें, तो ये subconscious का हिस्सा बन जाते हैं। Chronic stressful emotions को दबाने से long-term बीमारियां हो सकती हैं, जैसे कि latest research कहती है। Long-term research यह बताती है कि chronic illnesses का एक major reason stress है। 

    हम सोचते हैं कि जो चीज़ हम खुद से भी deny कर रहे हैं, वो खत्म हो जाएगी। यह एक toxic societal thinking है। हां, कभी-कभी एक healthy nervous system और coping mechanisms के साथ, difficult emotions को side करना चल सकता है। लेकिन अगर हम बार-बार ऐसा करें, तो nervous system पर pressure बनने लगता है। यह literally fake it till you make it वाला approach नहीं है, क्योंकि एक दिन आपका body इसे बर्दाश्त नहीं करेगा, और अपने तरीके से collapse कर जाएगा। 

    जब हम difficult emotions को दबाते हैं, तो body के response में freeze, fawn, fight और flight जैसे reactions होते हैं। यह और भी ज़्यादा traumas बनाते हैं, जैसे space trauma, financial trauma, scarcity trauma,emotional trauma आदि। Nervous system के लिए यह एक आदत बन जाता है हमेशा defensive होने का। चाहे हम इन triggers को label न करें, यह फिर भी हमारे nervous system को कभी भी impact कर सकते हैं। धीरे-धीरे, यह triggers हमें define करने लगते हैं, और हमारी personality का हिस्सा बन जाते हैं। लेकिन असल में, हमारे triggers controllable हैं – practice और मदद के साथ। अब ज़रूरत यह है कि हम समझें और accept करें कि healthy nervous system क्या होता है। कब मदद लेनी चाहिए, और जो मदद लेते हैं उन्हें shame नहीं करना चाहिए। Mental stress को भी physical stress की तरह treat करना चाहिए, जिसके लिए हम तुरंत medical attention लेते हैं। Problem को पहचानना उसका 50% solution है। यह उम्मीद है कि society समझे कि brain और body या mind और body दो अलग चीज़ें नहीं हैं। दोनों को healthy रहना ज़रूरी है एक healthy और happy ज़िंदगी जीने के लिए।

  • The Search Of A Soulmate

    Lately, I’ve started to believe that our search for a soulmate isn’t a quest for answers—it’s a quest for shared questions.

    For centuries, we’ve idealized the notion of a soulmate as “the answer to all my questions.” Love songs, poetry, and stories tell us that we were born incomplete, carrying questions only our beloved could answer. But what if we’ve misunderstood this narrative? What if the answers have always been there—offered by our friends, our family, or even life itself? What if the essence of a soulmate lies not in answers, but in the questions they ask?

    Friends, after all, satisfy our curiosity. They give us answers, clarity, and a sense of grounding. That’s why friendships endure; they fill gaps in our understanding. A soulmate, however, is different. They are not the ones who settle your uncertainties—they are the ones who mirror them. They ask the same questions that keep you awake at night.

    This idea might feel unsettling, especially in a world where love is marketed as a solution. We’re taught to seek compatibility through shared goals, values, and intellectual pursuits. We’re told to look for someone who “completes us” or “makes us better.” But what if the true purpose of a soulmate is to stand beside us, equally lost, equally searching?

    It’s not the answers that bind us, but the shared journey of questioning. To feel truly connected to another is to see your own confusion reflected in their eyes and to find comfort in that mutual uncertainty. The idea of “completion” becomes irrelevant because the bond isn’t about fixing; it’s about exploring.

    This is why relationships often falter when one partner “finds the answer.” The balance shifts. Suddenly, the partnership feels unequal—one leads while the other lags behind. In such moments, the relationship risks becoming an uncomfortable hierarchy, rather than the safe haven it once was.

    A soulmate isn’t a wise teacher sent to enlighten you. They’re not the long-awaited guru with a roadmap to your life. They are, instead, your fellow wanderer—the same goofy, clueless last-bencher who doesn’t have all the answers either. Together, you stumble through life, laughing, tripping, and asking questions that may never have answers.

    The real question, then, isn’t “Who is my soulmate?” but rather, “What are my questions?” Have you sat with your doubts long enough to understand them? Have you figured out what you’re truly searching for? Because only when you understand your own questions can you recognize the ones who share them.

    A soulmate isn’t a destination. They’re not an endpoint to your search. They are a companion who joins you on the journey, walking beside you through the uncharted terrain of life’s mysteries. And maybe, just maybe, the beauty lies in the questions themselves, not the answers we once thought we needed.

  • The fallacy of attempts

    How often have we longed for that spark of motivation? That voice from the sky, a tiny heartbeat in our ears urging us to take the first step?

    For many of us, this yearning is all too familiar, a moment suspended between desire and inaction, waiting for something, or someone, to nudge us forward.

    As a chronic procrastinator, sometimes for serious reasons, sometimes not, I’ve always been fascinated by what drives people to take action.

    What makes some of us leap forward while others remain paralyzed, endlessly circling the starting line?

    The Movers and Their Mysteries

    Some people seem to glide through life as if they’re on a giant slide, propelled by some invisible force.

    Call it discipline, ambition, routine, or perhaps an external push imposed by others. Whatever it is, this internal fire, their ability to take that crucial first step, is enviable.

    But what fuels them?

    Is it the anxiety of falling behind?

    The thrill of belonging to something greater?

    Validation from society, family, or themselves?

    Perhaps it’s faith in a higher power, an idol, or a purpose beyond comprehension.

    Their motivations might spring from the darkest corners of revenge and jealousy or from the purest emotions of love and self-fulfillment.

    For some, the drive comes from parental expectations; for others, it’s the inability to sit still.

    To one, life means constant striving; to another, it’s about leaving a legacy in this fleeting existence.

    For some,it is just about being human which means ‘to do’. 

    The Strugglers Who Falter

    Then there are those who, no matter how inspired, can’t seem to sustain the momentum. They stumble, either before or after the first attempt, always falling short of motivation.

    They may have a long list of reasons, but the bottom line remains: when things get tough, they crumble.

    For some, life deals an unfair hand, unrelenting challenges that make success, as defined by society, seem unattainable. Their priorities might lie in caring for family, while the world measures success in wealth.

    For them, moving slowly is essential to their version of fulfillment, even as the world glorifies the endless chase.

    These two kinds of people, those who sprint forward and those who hold back, are, perhaps, just two sides of the same coin.

    Their grit may be the same, but their non-negotiables differ, shaped by personal circumstances, values, and priorities.

    Beyond the Surface: Motivation and Culture

    It’s not just about individual choice; cultures, societies, and communities deeply influence what we value and strive for.

    Historically, collective goals have been shaped by the needs of the time, whether survival, economic growth, or social order. These goals trickle down, shaping individual aspirations and defining what we deem “successful.”

    But as societies evolve, so too must these common goals. It’s time to move beyond shaming those who choose a different path. In communities where survival is no longer the pressing issue, individuals should be free to set their own definitions of success.

    For some, this might mean wealth or career achievements; for others, it might mean the simple joy of being alive, breathing, and existing without the need for constant striving.

    The Freedom to Be

    Perhaps the ultimate goal is not about doing or achieving, but about being.

    To embrace our personal journeys without fear of judgment, to honor our choices even when they don’t align with societal norms.

    After all, life’s true value isn’t measured by external benchmarks but by how authentically we live it.

    So, whether you’re driven by ambition, propelled by discipline, or simply savoring the bliss of being, know this:

    your path is yours alone.

    And that is enough.

  • Love Beyond Labels

    What is love, really? Is it admiration, desire, or something deeper we cannot define? Often, we confuse admiration with love. We fall for movie stars, teachers, idols, a popular senior at school or work or anyone we can look up to, mistaking the spark of admiration for the depth of love. It seems so natural to blend the two, but is it truly love, or just the awe of seeing something extraordinary in another person?

    Love takes countless forms, yet our minds often categorize it into two rigid boxes: sexual and non-sexual, platonic or amorous. When we love our friends for their warmth and support, it’s labeled as friendship. Ignoring homosexuality for a second, two girls sharing deep friendship are idolised as sisters and two boys in a very strong bond are called bromancing. But when affection grows too strong in the typical heterosexual eyes, the same possibly platonic friendship with opposite sex is suggested to be deep romantic unrealized love. Why are we in such a hurry to define and box every bond?

    Are we genetically programmed to seek closure? Perhaps uncertainty unsettles us. Living in the moment is uncomfortable when we don’t know where it’s heading. If we find happiness with more than one person, society brands the person as frivolous, a philanderer. If we focus on one person too much, we’re called obsessed. Why are we so desperate to label love, to control it, to make it fit into neat categories?

    How, then, can anyone be sure of themselves when it comes to love? At what point in life does clarity come? How many years must we live before we understand what love truly means?

    Look around, and you’ll see that after money, love is what we’re always chasing. But no single kind of love seems enough. We crave the unconditional love of parents and siblings, the camaraderie of friends, and the intimacy of romantic relationships. Yet, we also hope to find one person—a soulmate—who can fulfill all these needs. Does this mean we instinctively know love has many layers? Is it revealing that not all feelings labeled as love are the same?

    Love is called the greatest emotion, but why is it so entangled with want? Is wanting someone the same as loving them? Or is giving the true essence of love? When I see goodness in someone which nobody else can, making them a special person from just an ordinary person in my life, is that love? If I don’t particularly like someone but still can’t bear to let go of them, is that love—or moral responsibility? When did love, supposedly limitless, become confined by ethics and boundaries?

    Am I giving too much importance to love? Perhaps. But all I know is that I enjoy unraveling its mysteries. The questions it raises are as infinite as the emotion itself. Love remains the most beautiful, perplexing puzzle of all.